I consider myself to be fairly level headed in most of my day to day interactions (I am sure some of you are snorting and/or rolling your eyes as you read that one…keep it to yourself, this here is my blog), however I really have a hard time keeping it together while driving. Actually, I should amend that. I don’t actually have to be driving to rage out, I need only be a passenger. Once that seat belt is buckled I morph into a superhero whose sole purpose is to save the world from jackass drivers. As a result, my kids have been exposed to some fairly colorful language. If my 3 year old ever calls you the C word…she learned it from her dad, I swear.
My road rage rears its ugly head whenever I am pregnant. You can blame the crazy pregnancy hormones (go ahead, I did) but I seriously go off the rails with each pregnancy. I was approximately 8 months pregnant with O when D and I decided to drive to Long Island from the City in order to complete our registry. D was driving and I was sitting shotgun. We hit a bunch of traffic on the Southern State parkway (huge surprise I know) and I lost it. We hadn’t been stopped for more than three minutes when I began to sweat. Traffic began to inch along when someone cut us off. Without thinking, I reached over and laid on the horn for a good two minutes. It was aggressive and totally irrational. D was so annoyed (read: livid) with me. D expressed his concern for my safety and that of our unborn child. He was totally freaked out by my reaction to an average stressor, and he reminded me that people are crazy and have been killed for less. I agreed with him and promised to control myself in the future.
Fast forward approximately two years to my pregnancy with S. O and I were turning onto a busy three lane road, when a gigantic Coca Cola truck veered into my lane with absolutely no regard for O’s safety or mine. I slammed on the brakes and avoided impact. At that point I was so incensed, I am not sure I knew what I was doing. I followed the truck into a parking lot, rolled down my window and proceeded to read the driver the riot act. To say he was surprised is the understatement of the year. Picture a 5 foot tall, hugely pregnant lunatic screaming at the very large (very polite) driver of a mack truck. Ridiculous. Also, dangerous and stupid. I resolved to change my ways. I no longer freak out on people who drive poorly, though I can’t say that I don’t mutter obscenities now and then (read: everyday). Yesterday though, was the first time I saw a road rager from the other side of the fence.
I was driving along with O and S at approximately 45 mph, which is the posted speed limit on the road we were on. A blue pickup opted to turn out of the bank driveway, cutting me off. I honked my horn in a totally justifiable manner (read: not overly aggressive). The driver, a female in her late 20’s, stuck her arm out the window and gave me the finger. So I honked once more. She then refused to drive even though traffic was backing up behind us. People were honking at her and cutting over into the lane next to us. I cut over and drove away and she tried to pull up alongside of me. At this point she noticed O and S in the car with me. I could see the shame written all over her face. She quickly drove off and turned down the next block. I know just how she felt because I used to be her. I really hope she realizes that it just isn’t worth it before it is too late.